I didn't have jury duty, and a bunch of other reasons today was wonderful!

I guess I have been living well, because my jury group was dismissed before I ever got there!  I was supposed to report for a 1:00 case, and was getting ready to walk what I would guess is about 3 1/2 miles to the courthouse, when I called a second time and found out that I was excused instead!   Yay God !!!  LOL 

I now have a car!  Isn't that amazing?????  For anywhere from six months to a year, I will be driving what we have always called my SIL's "midlife crisis" car.  A 2005 Scion.   It looks just like this:

I am thinking of buying dark glasses...just to live up to the image!  LOL 

I am pretty much still shaking from the events of the past few days.  At least that is the excuse I am going to use if someone asks me why the car jerks when I change gears.  (It's been a while since I drove a stick!  But I think I am improving.  I just need practice!) 

If I sound like a 16 year old boy, you will have to excuse me...but I am just kinda overflowing today. 

MOON ROOF !!!!!

Okay, there, I said it. 

My SIL spent three hours detailing the car today, to make sure that it was in tip top shape for me.  It's kind of hard for me to take that in.  That someone would be so thoughtful, spend half of his day off doing something so nice.  I am just not used to that kind of personal investment, I guess. 

I cleaned out the garage this morning, so the car can be kept indoors as much as possible.  My Nissan was a little to big, since I have a lot of storage and a freezer at the far end of the garage.  I couldn't walk around to get to the freezer if the car was in there.  Now, I can !

OUTSIDE TEMPERATURE DISPLAY!!!!


REMOTE LOCK AND UNLOCK!!!! 

All of a sudden, I feel like I have been Amish my entire life.  Not that there's anything wrong with that!

Something else wonderful happened today.  I received a love package in the mail from one of my readers. 

Along with a beautiful note written on a vintage card (LOVE), she sent me an enormous supply of FoodSaver rolls, some cherry vanilla tea, which I am having in the morning, quince/vanilla jam, a WONDERFUL pasty cloth from Oklahoma, and my new best friend. 

Isn't he wonderful?  An no cage to clean !!!!

And a THIRD blessing came my way today as well.  Mom asked me if I would like to go on an overnight to the beach sometime soon!   WOULD I???!!!!   Dad is doing very well, and she thinks she can get away overnight, and doesn't want to go alone.  I am going over there tomorrow to check Priceline with her.  She has needed a break for a long time, and really deserves one.  I hope to make it very special for her. 

Just a quick update on my "doin's". 

Tonight, I am dehydrating some tomato sauce.  It's almost done, maybe an hour more.  I am seriously looking into making a whole lot (like 100) MRE's and maybe even giving a demonstration about them sometime soon. 

(I am giving something away now.) 

I am seriously considering starting an Extreme Frugality Club, with meetings and everything, to discuss, demonstrate and teach all the things we have talked about here on the blog these past several years.  I think people are ready to take frugal living and maybe beginning homesteading seriously.  So, anyway, part of that would be the "emergency meals", maybe once a month cooking (if I can talk my niece into demonstrating), of course the garden (Hmm, Maureen?  Are you game?)  Plus canning of course, and all the other fun things I love to do:  Homemade cleaning products, solar cooking, panir cheese, no-knead bread, etc.  The best part, though, would be the input that others would bring with them.  There is a lot to learn out there!   (Don't forget to click on over to Heritage Skills link at the top of the right column for more information.)

Speaking of which, when I got to DRIVE to the store today, I found a great deal on Welch's grape juice (not cocktail) at $2 a half gallon.  So, I bought two and started a new batch of closet wine!  The second batch of apple is working right along, and the first smells pretty dang good, if I do say so myself! 

Anyway, that's what happened to make my day a blessing!  Did I work at my job?  A little; there wasn't much to do.  I was just a TAD excited !!!!

Okay, gonna get some sleep now, I guess.  Or I might browse through the sundry listings for motels at the beach !!!!  Here's where my daughter's family stayed last month.  Hmm....Priceline?????

Rooftop Common Area

Actually, I don't care where we stay, as long as I get to see this:



So, let me tell you what God did today.

Actually, we will start with last night. 

I have been so upset about this credit card thing, about my car, about the recent stresses.  And I have been praying diligently for a very long time that the Lord would help me trust Him more, have more faith.  We talked about that the other day, I think.   (I act like we are having a conversation...what a dork.)

Anyway, I believe that the Lord has given me these recent challenges as opportunities to trust Him. 

Last evening, I was praying and pacing up and down the hall of my house---from the fourth bedroom on out to the fireplace in the living room and back again.  It's been a while since I have done that, because it is hard to focus (ADD), but it also FORCES  me to focus, if you know what I mean. 

So, I am talking to the Lord about all the things that are piling up right now, and I was speaking intensely, with great emotion and earnestness.  And while I was finishing my 12th or 13th lap, the Lord clearly spoke to my heart:  "I want you to sell your car tomorrow."  I asked if I ought to go right then and place an ad on CraigsList, but I knew as soon as I asked that I was to do it tomorrow, which was today.  So, I did some research, found out what the car is supposedly worth, thought it was ridiculously high for the problems this car had. 

I also looked up the cost of a three wheeled bike (non-electric) and added that to the amount I owe on that &@#^$()%# credit card and decided that I needed $1600.  But I was hoping for a little extra, so this afternoon when I posted on CL, I asked for $2000. 

I got five emails in the first two hours, and told them all to be here at 6 PM.  Only one guy showed up. 

He test drove it, had me help him test the transmission, listened to the noises, and offered me $1500.  Hmm.  I countered with $1800, and he came back with $1700.  I asked him for a minute so I could pray about it.  And the Lord said "That's $100 more than you need.  Accept that blessing."  So, I did. 

I mentioned earlier that it was a hard exchange for me.  Wow...  But I just kept thanking the Lord and telling Him how much I trust that this whole thing is for my own good.  I told Him that I knew His plans for me are so much better than I could ever hope for, and thanked Him for helping me trust Him. 

I was still sniffling a couple of minutes ago when the phone rang. 

Today, my daughter and her husband bought a new car.  Within a month, they will buy one for me as well. 

Please praise the mighty name of God with me.  I am here to tell you how faithful He is, how trustworthy, how loving.  He is Jehovah-jireh, my provider.  This is just blowing my mind.  He didn't even wait a day.

Here's one of the electric three wheelers

http://www.omegastores.com/etrikecopy.htm

Well, that was mercifully fast.

My car sold in just a couple of hours.  I got enough for it to pay off the credit card and have enough left to buy a motorized three-wheeled bike, just like ALL the geezers drive ! 

I had the car ten years.  It was like losing an arm or something.  I can't believe I am still crying !  

When I cleaned out under the seats, I found brochures from when I went to Vegas with my daughter YEARS ago.  Man, that really brought it home.

Okay, on to the DMV to fill out the online release of liability forms, and then to cancel my car insurance. 

I am selling my car.

Been praying a lot the past few days about what to do.  Last night, I felt the Lord telling me to sell it --today.  Not sure if that means to actually do the deal today, or what.  So, I just went ahead and put a nice, honest post on CraigsList. 

I went to Edmonds.com and appraised the car.  They asked for condition, and I checked the box that said it runs, but needs major repairs, has some cosmetic issues.  I think that describes it well.  They appraised it at about $3500, mostly because it is 12 years old and only has $104K miles, I think.  Anyway, here's the link to the post.  http://visalia.craigslist.org/cto/2883134236.html

I needed a place for the squash

I love my raised beds as much as I detest squash.  So, I am not inclined to waste a raised bed growing that....stuff. 

You may remember that I have a huge area covered in black plastic (one year down, one to go) in order to try and kill Bermudagrass.  Well, It's killing me to see that huge area sit there without being productive.  I mean, it's ugly as sin out there, but I am wondering if looks are all that important!  I mean, most of the plastic is patched together pieces from other areas in the yard, weighted down with fence boards and broken bricks.  No House Beautiful here. 

To be honest, I have already cheated just a little bit.  Along one edge of the black plastic (near a cement slab) I folded back a couple feet of the plastic and plated some potatoes there.  All of them are breaking through now, and there is very little Bermuda.  So far.  I did pull some weeds, but they weren't Bedmuda.

The piece of patched plastic I am talking about is about 12x20 feet.  Oh shoot, I can just get over my embarrassment about how tacky it looks and show you. 

Here's the overall picture of the area.  See, what I did, if you can make it out, is to dig several trenches and then cover them with plastic, and poke holes in the trenches for drainage.  There are flat areas between the trenches, where I will cut holes in the plastic and plant the dreaded squash. 

In the foreground are the potatoes, and impossible to see at the far side are the peas. I will add closeups.

Potatoes coming up in my nasty clay soil.

See the holes in the trench for drainage?  Looks like they worked!  Bush peas about 5" tall, every 15".   Yeah, I did lose one pea to transplant shock.  I know you aren't really supposed to transplant peas, but I am willing to rebel against almost any "hard and fast rule". 

While I was outside with my camera, I thought I would document for myself the tomatoes I planted yesterday in the 8' bed.  I still have a dozen seedlings I started myself, but they are just shy of a pathetic failure, so I bought four packs for $1.68 and considered it a bargain.  These are Celebrity, a determinate hybrid. 

The cabbages are doing very well in the buckets, don't you think.  I didn't shoot the broccoli, but it's faring just as nicely as the cabbage.  Maureen sure knows how to do this seed starting thing.  Thanks, Maureen!!!

Okay, th race to harvest has begun !  I like documenting the progress here.  Makes it easy to go back and check! 

Up in the middle of the night.

Yes, it is almost one in the morning and I am back online.  Couldn't sleep.  I think I have figured something out. 

I talked earlier about what's going on in my financial life (I am an open book, aren't I?).  And my car problems.  Well, this afternoon I got a notice from an attorney about a debt I thought I had paid off.  Over the past six or seven years, I paid off $16,000 in debt.  I reviewed the history of this account today, and after making regular payments on $5000 for two years, I didn't know how much more I had to pay, so I asked the debtor three times to give me a balance due report or I would stop making payments.  They never even acknowledged my request.  My last payment to them was thus made in December 2010.  They never followed up by phone or mail, until today when I got the notice in the mail.  I have ten days to pay the $1050  balance or they will ask the court to make a judgment against me.  I am deeply troubled by this, especially after having worked to hard to get out of debt.   

So, is that what is keeping me awake?  Yes, but in a more general way. 

The bottom line is that I have been praying the past few months to have more trust.  Man, I really have serious issues when it comes to trusting people.  Men, mostly, but also God. When I pray, there is always this nagging doubt in the back of my mind that He isn't going to help me.  Mostly because I don't think I deserve His care.  But also because, like so many of us, I pray and pray and pray, and I guess the answer is almost always "Later".  At least it seems that way.  And yes, I know that God works on His own timetable, but after so very many years of some pretty specific prayers on some key issues, I have to admit that my faith and trust waver quite a bit.  So, I asked the Father to help me learn how to trust Him.

Why did I do that?  What is wrong with me?  I mean, don't we all know that when we ask for, oh, let's say patience, for example, the Father puts us in circumstances where patience is required....in spades.  Because you don't get stronger unless you exercise!   What, didn't I think He would do the same exact thing when I asked for faith and trust?  Because from the looks of things, that's exactly what has happened.  Face it, I am down to the pennies in the jar right now, my monthly income is going to be several hundred dollars short of budget, my car is falling apart and I can't fix it, smog it, insure it, register it, or put gas in it.  I have just had a VERY difficult few weeks while working on emotional healing, and right in the middle of it all, I asked for more faith and trust.  Then I get this notice today.  Coincidence?  I think not. 

So now I have to give legs to my desire for more faith and trust.  How do I do that?  About the only thing I know to do is to spend a LOT more time in the Word and in prayer.  And that's why I am up so late.  Whenever I get into a deep prayer with the Father, it starts in the evening and I am almost always up all night.  Not praying that whole time, but with the emotional release and often the turmoil that comes from that kind of interaction.  I just can't calm down, is what I am saying. 

So, that's what's up tonight, in its entirety.  I was thinking I might do a little typing for my work in the middle of the night, but writing this has taken the edge off, so I will try and go to sleep. 

Thanks for listening.  And if you have a minute, could you just send up a speed prayer for me, that I will be able to believe and to trust that the Father WILL help me?  I know He can...but so often I am just not sure He will.  I feel that I have let Him down an awful lot, and that He is too disappointed in me to provide what I need.  Like I said, trust. 

So what else can we do?

Amy made sort of an off-hand comment on a previous post about trying to figure out what more can be done to cut costs.  I read several blogs written by women who are making incredibly deep cuts, eliminating all the frills and luxuries, etc.  Shoot, they cut out things I have never had in all my born days!  Gee, cutting back on that vacation to Europe must have stung !  LOL 

Anyway, I think I have cut back about as far as I can.  I don't have all the bells and whistles that most people consider essential, such as cable or cell phone.  And I have made all the usual cuts in daily expenses, make my own cleaning products, grow my own food, put food in jars like a wild woman, and on and on...we all know those homesteading basics. 

But there has to be more we can do.  More ways to cut expenses or create income.  Many of us are stymied by local regulations as far as things like raising chickens or selling produce in the front yard.  I wish there were ways around those regulations.  (Actually, there is a bill in the California Assembly that will make it easier for individuals to sell things from home to supplement income.  AB1616.  Sure hope it passes !)

So basically, about the only thing aynybody can do is control their consumption of resources, such as food, water, power, and fuel.  I fortunately qualify for low income discounts on all my utilities, so that, along with conservation eforts, gives me very low monthly bills.  I am so grateful for that. 

What else can we do?  Are there things you have done to safe money or create income that you could share with the rest of us?  I imagine we all do about the same kinds of things, but perhaps you have a wonderful idea that we haven't tried yet. 

Basically....HELP !!!!!!

Final picture of dehydrated chili

I mixed the pureed and the whole bean together in the bowl.  The whole beans are completely dry and dehydrated.  The puree crumbled easily and completely.  Going to pack it in ziplock bags when it cools completely (condensation) and put it away for another day. 

How will we know when TSHTF?

I have been reading more and more blogs such as this one:  http://sevenyearsofplenty.blogspot.com/2012/03/food-storage-forecast-2012.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+SevenYearsOfPlenty+%28Seven+Years+of+Plenty%29

Have you?  And have you been paying attention to prices at the grocery store?  They keep getting higher, and the packaging keeps getting smaller.  I paid $4.57 for gas last week.  The big trucks that deliver food to the grocery stores, they pay that much and sometimes more.  You know what that's going to do to the price of food? 

The Obama administration calls this a "recovery".  To me, it's a warning. 

We laugh about "the end of the world as we know it", don't we?  It's a topic of uncomfortable and brief conversations.  But sometimes I have to stop and think -- What IS the world as we know it?  What have we already lost?  How is the world as we KNEW it, different today? 

As we lose our freedoms and find more and more of our money being confiscated by a government which doesn't have our well being in mind, what changes have already happened? 

I can only answer for myself.  You will have to look at your life and find your own answers. 

When I first started this blog, I talked quite a bit about how my life has already changed, how I went from $60K in 2006, to $14K in 2011.  My two week paycheck yesterday was $372. 

I am no longer able to replace the things I use from my food storage, and I consider that a very frightening red flag.  Last month, I had $8 left after I paid my bills.  Had it not been for my daughter's $10 while the girls were staying here, I would not have had gas for the car.  With that $8, I bought milk, eggs, and potatoes.  God provided everything else---basically starting three years ago when He whispered to me to start storing food. 

In a month, I have to register my car.  It needs to pass the smog test, which costs about $40.  It will not pass, because it has major problems, with estimated $1000+ in repair costs.  I can't even come close to that, of course.   But that's okay, because my tags, which I can't get unless the car passes smog, are $104.  Which I don't have either.  So, I will probably sell the car for a lot less than I could get for it otherwise, and buy a three-wheeled bike so I can get to the grocery store...which is just down the street (thank God!). 

So here I am at 60, and "the world as I know it" doesn't really exist anymore.  So has TSHTF for me?  Is it really TEOTWAWWKI already? 

I think maybe it is starting, but it's not as bad as it can, and will most likely, get.  The blessing to me is that I have had all these years to get used to the idea of a new, more extremely frugal, lifestyle. I have been learning hard gardening lessons, for example, during a time when my life doesn't depend upon my food producing skills! 

Basically, I was warned!  So, although I am not looking forward, for example, to riding a bike in 110 degree summers, or many other changes that are ahead of me, the fact that I have come so far and learned so much these past three years is a blessing not lost on me!  I am SO grateful to know what I know and to have listened to the Lord's whispered voice!  

I bet most of you are in pretty much the same boat, aren't you?  But maybe there are a few readers who think folks like me who are preparing for serious economic failure are just flat out nuts!  To the latter group, I say that what we do is insurance against an uncertain future.  It's no different than car insurance, home insurance or health insurance.  It is, on a very basic level, LIFE insurance...we are working and learning and preparing to keep on living when the REALLY bad stuff happens. 

I remember Noah, who built a boat before it started raining, and survived when everyone else died.  I think of the nation of Israel, which was given a prophecy about an upcoming seven year famine, and a grace period of seven years to prepare for it.  I wonder where we are as a nation in that seven year grace period.  For me, this is year four.  And I am starting to feel the famine heading our way.  I am concerned that I cannot replace the food I use, but I am blessed because I have so much of it stored!  And I am doubly blessed because when I started storing it, veggies were 39 cents a can! 

Anyway, those are my musings today.  I see a BIG change coming for me, personally.  And since any crisis hits the poorest first, you might want to think about your own situation, and what you could do to insure yourself and your family against the coming times.    Just a thought. 

Chili After Four Hours

I checked the dehydrator and found that the pureed chili had thick spots that needed to be turned over for the remainder of the time, as they are on parchment and the convection heat isn't getting the underside.  You don't really have to turn them, as the heat will eventually get there from the top, but it does speed things up a bit.

The whole bean is a different story entirely.  I did not thin this at all, and you can tell, because most of the sauce is just gone.  It is basically a thin film.  The beans are going to need another four hours at least to get completely dry. 

You probably know that you can click on these pictures to make them larger, for a better view. 

My final review would be that I prefer the pureed chili hands down.  It is going to take forever for the whole beans to rehydrate, and there really isn't any sauce to speak of.  I think adding 1/4 cup water to a can of chili in the food processor is enough to  thin it out as a paste, and turning over the thick parts after four hours will assure complete dehydration.  Yep, gonna work for me.

I am going to do some more commerical spaghetti sauce next.  Maybe not today, but soon.  I already have a half dozen cans dehydrated in a fruit leather like sheet, but I folded the product up into a shape like a deck of cards.  I think it would be better to cut the rubbery leather into smaller pieces and continue to dehydrate it until it is less moist.  I only have a few FoodSaver bags left, and I want to conserve.  And I only have one box of canning lids, as well, so I can't use all these wonderful jars with the FoodSaver attachment.  Soon, though. 

One more night...

...of cold temperatures (35 to 40) and then I think it will be safe to plant a bit more.  Today, I put the second round of bush peas and provider beans in the ground, and I think I may be able to put some tomato seedlings in the ground this week.  One of the two 4x8 raised beds is ready to receive the plants, so it's probably going to be tomorrow or maybe the weekend and I will plant them.  I have 20 that are far enough along to do well, and a second batch of 12 that need a couple more weeks.  That ought to do it. 

The second 4x8 will be planted in sweet peppers, which I use a LOT, so I am looking forward to lots of seedlings.  The ones I started on the counter I might consider a fail, since only four came up.  But the seeds were old, so I guess I got what I paid for!  I have a couple more packets of seeds, but it's going to take a month or so to get the money for the soil to fill the last bed, so maybe I will try again.  I will buy seedlings if I have to.  I need me some peppers! 

I had given up on the carrots that I planted, so I planted peas in that bed.  And of course, the carrots are now coming up.  I will just let it go and see what happens.  I do that a lot.  I make real gardeners cringe. 

I really don't want to plant squash this year.  But I guess I will, so my mom can have it.  I just detest the stuff, unless it is made into pickles!!!  I am out of the squash pickles I made a couple of years ago.  Wish I had written down the spices and the quantities, because they were SO good!  Oh well, live and learn. 

Dehydrating canned chili

As I mentioned, I am organizing and compacting my pantry.  In the process of rotating my purchased canned foods, I found a case of Dennison's Thick Chili dated Best By July 2010.  As I am sure we all know, those Best By dates are merely points at which the nutritional status of the can contents begins to change.  The food doesn't "go bad" by any stretch of the imagination.  It simply is now 99.9% instead of 100% nutritious.  The nutrition fades slowly, just a couple percent a year, so as long as the can doesn't start bulging, indicating contamination during the canning process, compromise by rust, or a hard crease in the can, the contents are safe to eat, but after 20 years or so they won't do much for your body! 

Anyway, I decided to try dehydrating the chili.  In the past, I have dehydrated mashed potatoes, refried beans, spaghetti sauce and beef stew into "bark".  Meaning that I thinned the food down and spread it on parchment sheets on the dehydrator trays, then dehydrated it until it was completely crisp.  Then I crumbled the bark, in some cases reduced it to powder in the food processor, and stored it in Foodsaver bags.  I guess that was about three years ago.  I opened up the beef stew yesterday and rehydrated some of it.  Not bad, if I do say so myself. 

So, today I am experimenting with chili from 2009.

I have six cans in the dehydrator right now.  Three of the cans, I just dumped the contents on the parchment and three of them I ran through the food processor with 1/4 cup water and spread the paste on the sheets.  I have the Excalibur running at 145 degrees right now, and anticipate a ten hour cycle, just to be sure the beans are dry all the way through.  I think the paste will do better, eventhough it is thicker, but we will see! 

Made some dehydrated meals today.

I have been reorganizing my pantry lately.  Having lived off the jarred food for most of the year, there were holes all over the place, and it was time to scrunch it all together so that I could add newer stuff to the shelves.  As well, there is a great project on the horizon which will free up a lot of space.  So, I have been busy.

Oh, and I had to throw away some stuff.  I know, I know...but it had to be done.  I had a number of things that I canned in 2009 that I had never used, and I had to be honest with myself...I am never really going to use cream of asparagus soup base, and the lemonade concentrate didn't taste very good.  So, I dumped about 30 jars down the drain.  I can't stand typing that, but the truth is, it was just taking up space, and I knew I wasn't going to use it. 

After the shelves were aligned the way I wanted them to be, I could easily see what I had, and I decided to open three pints of cubed chicken breast, drain the broth into a saucepan, and crumble the breast meat on dehydrator trays, as I have seen done so nicely online.  I got it quite fine and it took less than fou hours at 145 degrees to get crispy. 

With the broth, and the addition of some wire, I made a large pan of rice, then spread it thinly on more dehydrator trays.  And I opened some canned peas, drained them, and placed them on the final trays. 

After they were all nice and brittle, I chopped the chunks of rice in the food processor.  I grabbed some previously dehydrated veggies, such as carrots, celery and onions, as well as red bell pepper and chicken soup flavoring mix with veggies.  I divided it up between about ten zip locks, squished the air out, and rolled them up tight to store.  I will probably put a couple of those (unsealed mostly) in a Foodsver bag and get all the air out so they will store as long as possible.  Then pop a couple of those bags into the Go Bag. 

I tested a bit of the remainder, and it rehydrated very nicely, so onward and upward with more ideas.  I really like versatility !!!

Finally !

Whew, that was a long week! At last I have a few minutes to write a blog post!

I have to be honest, though. I actually have been spending a lot of my spare time organizing the pantry and satisfying my newly developed addicton to the TV show LOST, via Hulu. In the past week, I have watched 48 episodes. I keep the second computer turned to Hulu while I work, and the parts of the house close to a computer are sparkling clean !

God's been doing a lot of great things. As always! I have been struggling with some emotional healing issues the past two weeks, and it has been tough, but fruitful.

Someone who dislikes me a great deal and has done their best to undermine my relationships with people I love told me not too long ago that the only reason I write this blog is to fish for compliments, to try and get people to say nice things about me. I had a couple of reactions to that statement. First, to laugh because that's not something I would have ever considered. But second, I felt sad for this person. Angry, for sure, but sad, too. I mean, people who are happy and in loving, close relationships (both friends and family) don't think that way. Let alone speak it aloud. So, after I got through being angry at such a ridiculous ploy, I felt a deep sense of pity for someone who would try it.

Okay, so the emotional healing is going on. What I just said, that's part of it. Needing to practice being my best self in the face of negativity. I don't want to to that sometimes, you know? I mean, sometimes it actually feels GOOD to be mad about injustice and to think of ways to "get even". But then to actually consider taking those actions...that's just not me. I don't mean violence or anything like that, of course. What I mean is that I want to tell the truth about a lot of stuff, to stand up for myself and not to be a doormat in the face of such things. But it is not my job nor is it my place to do that. It is up to the Lord to protect and defend. And if He could teach and heal those whose pain is so palpable, what a wonderful bonus that would be.

Okay, now I want to testify to the glory of God.

My Dad has been off Hospice for I think about three weeks now. It has been almost three months since he quit dialysis, and his kidney function tests continue to improve. He has decided to return to the treatment for his blood cancer, and he is doing very well. I sure wish he had never quit that treatment.  He got terribly weak, and now he is able to walk and to drive, even though it is not recommended that he do so.  You may have gleaned that you don't tell my Dad what to do. 

Anyway, while he was on Hospice, the chaplain came with every team that visited Dad. And every time he came, they talked about spiritual things. Mom and I spoke with the chaplain several times, and let him know that it was very important to us that Dad find the Lord.

After the last visit Hospice made with Dad, the chaplain told mom and me about a conversation he had with Dad just a few minutes before. Basically, Dad told the chaplain that he had been praying and that God had told him that he was going to be okay.

Now, that is remarkable on a lot of levels, not the least of which is my dad actually acknowledged that there was a God who was willing to communicate with humans. He has vehemently denied that possibility for as long as I have known him. Dad had never been receptive to spiritual things prior to this time.

As part of the journey I have been on the past several weeks, I have had to step away from helping my parents. A lot of issues have been swirling around me, and I just needed some time and emotional space so that I could first figure out what they were, and then find my way back to the arms of my Savior.

The time came for me to reconnect with them, and I sought the Lord for the courage to do something bold.

So, I went over there yesterday and sat down with Dad and told him what was on my heart.
I told him that I literally have internet friends all over the world praying for him. When I have said similar things in the past, he has either not responded or has said something about it being a waste of time.

This time, he simply said, "Thank you."

Okay, I managed not to pass out with that!

And then, with a quick mental prayer, I said: "Dad, I think God is healing you. I think you are going to be okay." He nodded and said, "You may be right."  I responded: "I don't think He is done with you yet." And he smiled.

It was a good day.

How they can in Tajikistan/Russia

I mentioned below that Hilola (daughter's exchange student from Tajikistan) is staying with me this weekend.  I really like this kid a LOT! 

Anyway, she lives with her grandmother and her aunt and uncle in the capital of Tajikistan, Dushanbe.  (Hope I got that right.)   Anyway, her grandmother is my age (which makes her VERY young), and she has been canning foods such as tomatoes, pickles and jams for many years.  You might think "Oh!  Water bath canning is world wide !"  And you would actually be quite wrong. 

She showed me a video of the process her grandmother uses, although this is not her grandmother!   I think you will find it absolutely fascinating! 

The leaves used are horseradish, currents, and a fresh bay leaf.  The use a powder called lemon acid to acidify the jars, and only use a tablespoon or two of vingear, because of the taste being unpleasant. 

I wonder just how badly the American Canning Police are going to freak out over the process they use!   I cracked up. 

But what you really have to see is how they seal the jars.  A hint:  The middle of the device compressed the lids (which are not unscrewed but rather popped off with a bottle opener) and pushes out all of the air, and then the edge of the lid catches and holds the vacuum.  No glue. 

I told Holi about the recommendations made by the American government on how to can foods.  It was a little embarrassing.  I mean, she lives in what used to be the Soviet Union and they get to can any way they choose, without living in fear of botulism if they don't hold their mouth right when canning.   Know what she said?  "We have been canning like this for hundreds of years and nobody dies." 

She also told me that her grandmother checks on new canning jars every day for a while after they go on the shelf, and "if the lids start to bulge up, we eat them right away." 

Hard to imagine that American home canners live in more fear than a country which was under Communism until 1991.  We are such mind-controlled robots. 

Anyway, I got a huge kick out of the video, and even looked at others in the sidebar just for fun. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hD0WumQ_Fg

My CAPS LOCK had a hairball

Yes, I WILL post almost anything that amuses me!!!!   (But to be fair, you DID click on it.)

My computer keyboard has been somewhat dysfunctional the past couple of days, what with not typing certain keys and all.  Especially the A and S keys....which are somewhat necessary. 

So, I got some Q-Tips and some alcohol to clean between the keys.  Which, of course, makes no sense at all, but I noticed a lot of dust and thought I would take an ADD moment to clean the keyboard. 

I noticed several pieces of dog hair on the Q-Tip.  And I wondered if Reagan had a facebook account I don't know about.  So, I shook the keyboard whilst it was upside down, and a ton of disgusting crumbs and dog hair came out.  I was grossed out. 

And then I saw one of MY hairs, and while that didn't seem quite as odd as the dog hair, I decided to pull it out manually, and it fought back ! 

So, I got a wooden toothpick and ran it down the gulley between the rows of keys and when I got to the Caps lock, I discovered this: 

It kind of looks like a prehistoric tadpole or something, but it's a quarter-sized mass of lint and dog hair and it is gross.  So I thought I would share it, because that's how I roll !

Playing Around

Ever since I started thinking about the inner child concept, I have been trying to find ways to be more child-like.  I am having a hard time overall, but once in a while I give myself permission to do something other than sit here and type for my job.  The past several days, I have worked 12 hours each day, but it has been slow and not very fruitful.  So, I decided this morning to just grab my camera and go outside and take five pictures.  That's it, just five pictures.  And then tweak them a little to suit my fancy.  I don't have Photoshop on this computer, so I just did what I could with the Picasa, which wasn't much.  But, I like what I ended up with, which was natural photographs with just a beensy bit of a boost. 

It is clear that I am not a photographer, but some day I would like to be.  I just need a camera that isn't made by Fisher-Price and a little education ! 

A different spin on food freedom

Over the past several years, I have made a couple of tries at starting a small cottage business which would involve foodstuffs. I created chocolate-based baking mixes, for example, and sold them at home parties. I taught free canning classes (because I wasn't allowed to charge for them), but could not give jars of food to the students. I tried to get started as a caterer and personal chef, but the regulations were overwhelming and expensive. And of course I sold jam, and it was pretty much just dumb luck that I got away with it.

Finally, common sense has come to California...I hope!

Our California legistlature is considering a Cottage Food Bill which would make it easier for plain old folks like me to produce certain (safe) items in the home kitchen for sale. As of now, we have to use only a certified commercial kitchen, which are almost impossible to find. Home kitchens would be inspected and there would still be government involvement and other regulations, fees, certifications, etc., but it really is an awesome first step to help struggling creative people earn a few dollars

So, I am throwing this out there, hoping that any Californians who believe we ought to be free to make and sell food items in, for example, Farmer's Markets. The link below has more information and a petition to sign. You can share on facebook or your blog, if you are in support. I hope you are !!!

http://www.change.org/petitions/california-state-legislature-enact-a-cottage-food-law-in-california#

The Inner Child

A very long time ago, I consulted a therapist. He is the one who diagnosed me with ADD, after testing gave me a 97% probability.

He is also the one who explained to me the concept of the inner child. Now, it's been a couple of decades, so I don't remember exactly what he said. But last night I was deep in prayer, asking the Father for healing and for strength, and the term came to mind. So, I turned on the trusty laptop and spent a couple of hours alternating between sitting cross-legged on the bed, and crying into my pillow. No wonder I avoided this subject for so long!

I am not going to attempt to explain it in detail, but in general the concept is that everyone has an "inner child" inside them, and in each person it plays a different role. Lots of people are very comfortable with their inner child, and had a delightful and stress-free childhood. And some, well, not so much. Because parents are not mind-readers, and they do the best they can, most of us have unmet needs to varying degrees. The way I see it, the inner child represents those unmet needs, to whatever level they exist. And it is the intensity of those unmet needs that is implicated as the cause for many adult problems, such as relationship difficulties, perfectionism, and so on.

I don't intend to discuss this in much detail, other than to point the interested reader to a very good article on the subject: http://www.livestrong.com/article/14692-inner-child/ and to talk about one of the things that may help bring that inner child to adulthood in a healthy way. I was careful to say ONE of the things, as this isn't a bandaid that will keep the wound clean until it heals. It's a beginning. A way to begin to acknowledge and address a need, a loss, a wound.

I am talking about play. Play? Really? Like jump rope or dodge ball? Yes, exactly. Or, running around the yard, dancing freely, creating primitive art, singing out loud...playing with dolls, or even creating a doll of your own, that represents you as a child.

I don't want to get into this too deeply here. That's why I have a private blog. But what I do want to offer is the notion that acting child-like (privately may be best) has nothing to do with being childish. I loved the article's suggestions about going for a walk and seeing things as thougth it were your first time. Look through your child eyes and see the details and the colors and how the design of the thing is beautiful.

I love looking at multicolored flowers and studying the interface of the hues, how they mix and blend on the petals. And I love water, especially a shady stream. I am in awe of the ferns that grow alongside the cool, damp roadsides up in the Santa Cruz mountains, and the golden sea of daffodils, even if it is only at Home Depot! When I lived on the Central California Coast, there were flower farms in several places, and you could drive a road above them for a ways and see how the patchwork of color extended as far as the horizon sometimes. It was breathtaking.

So I think today I will meditate on what I can do to touch that child-like place I have inside, to feed my inner child a healthy diet of wonderment and joy. Not sure how, because somewhere in the day I have to be an adult. But I will figure it out, perhaps as I go !

Would you like to see a picture of the flower gardens from the coast?

And guess what they planted after 911?

Apple Wine Report

Last September, I made a post at www.heritageskills.blogspot.com describing the process to make wine out of apple juice or cider (preferred). http://heritageskills.blogspot.com/2011/10/making-wine-at-home-and-maybe-brandy.html

I gave it a shot! The first of October, I followed the instructions, put the jug in the hall closet and forgot about it until today. I have apple wine! Now, I don't drink, so to me it smells like I think it should, but I have no clue about the taste. It just tastes like booze. Not sure if it is GOOD booze or not, because I don't know the difference. But I bet if someone had a gallon of milk or a dozen eggs and wanted a pint of hootch, I could make a great trade!

I decanted the wine into canning jars washed out the jug and started another batch.

I have a lot of strawberry and raspberry lemonade concentrate. I would love to make something out of it, but I think the acid in the lemon might affect the yeast. Does anyone have input about workarounds for that?

Thanks ! (hic)

Need a boost this morning?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZvYozROF_0

Saturday was awesome!

DGD12 is spending the weekend; I may have mentioned that already.  Well, yesterday she was talking on the phone with her BFF and I had a wild hair, so I invited said BFF to come over and spend the night!   It turned out to be a God inspired idea!  What a precious young woman!  DGD12 picks great friends!

DGD cleaned the house for me while we were waiting for BFF, and then when she arrived they played video games, I made cupcakes, they watched movies and then I pulled out some of my craft supplies and they did an art project that, from the looks of things this morning, lasted until the wee hours!   See, I went in my room to fold laundry at about 7:30, and the next thing I knew it was 7 AM!!! 

I came out to my kitchen/office and found a beautiful heart-shaped pillow with a lovely note on it from the both of them!  AND.....there were cupcakes left!  SHOCKER!!!

While the girls were playing a celebrity dress-up game on the computer (and I was fixing dinner), BFF was taking her turn and she said, "I think I will give her these fetish shoes."  Well, I was a little surprised that BFF knew that word, so I casually asked her if she knew what it meant.  Of course, she didn't.  I told her that I was a little surprised that an awesome kid like her would use that word, and gave her the PG-13 definition.  She was appalled at herself, and  apologized profusely.     I told her that I had no bad feelings about her for that, because I didn't think someone as nice as her would know the meaning, so she was just repeating a word she had heard.  Now, when her Dad comes to pick her up, I need to tell him I broached that kind of a subject with his daughter...and NOW I get nervous!  LOL 

Random subject change -- The weatherman is predicting nights in the 40's for the foreseeable future, so I took a risk and planted some determinate peas and cucumbers in two of the raised beds yesterday.  Kind of an experiment, and if it doesn't work then I am only out $2. 

It's a little overcast today but at 8:30 in the morning it is 45 degrees, so maybe by the time I get my typing done for the morning I can go outside and trim the bushes or something.  A lot to catch up on! 

Got up on the RIGHT side of the bed for once!

It is absolutely BEAUTIFUL outside this morning!   DGD12 is still sleeping (pre-teens do that!), Reagan is lying in the sun (it's gonna be high 60's today), and I am hitting the typing job hard this morning until early afternoon.   Then DGD12 and I are going to work outside and just enjoy one another's company. 

I have been reading through Psalms the past couple of weeks.  What a great help they are when a person is confused and struggling to figure things out that cannot be explained!   Just trust the Lord for protection and for answers, as the Psalmist did in 37, when he wrote:  I have never seen the righteous forsaken.  And no, I am not righteous in and of myself.  But because of Jesus, and what He did for all of us, we have righteousness through Him.  I used to find it almost impossible to say that I had any righteousness at all until I understood that it is only through Christ that it comes. 

Waking up with that kind of thing on your mind pretty much guarantees a wonderful day, don't you think.

Summer is coming !

And in an area where summer temps surpass the century mark with surprising regularity, that isn't always a welcome statement.  I have never understood people who just LUUUVVV hot weather.  But they probably think I am nuts for turning off my heater at night in the winter! 

There are lots of things to do to get the garden ready, as I have talked about ad nauseum, and the guy who wanted to rent my back yard seems to have found better "digs", you should pardon the pun.  So I find myself all primed and ready for something to happen, and am somewhat disappointed!  I need some inspiration. 

I love to teach these frugal living and heritage skills, but have been stymied by city ordinances and insurance rules.  I am hoping to get back to work on my book on extreme frugality, but to tell you the truth I am burned out on sitting at the computer all day, and have trouble focusing enough to get much done.  I have 40 chapters planned, and only 15 written in almost two years....so it is slow going.  I need ACTION!!!! 

My DGD12 is with me this whole weekend, so I think we will start a couple of projects.  Maybe plant some flower seeds or something.   Anything that signifies hope and a fresh start. 

Mom has asked me to start cooking meals for her and Dad again.  She has quite a few still in the freezer, and I think in her way she is telling me they didn't care for those.  So, I will work up some suggestions and see what sounds good.  I really do enjoy doing that for them. 

I am getting more and more concerned for the state of our nation, especially after the headline today that says Obama may already have won a second term, just because the Republicans have such bad  andidate choices.  Well, maybe that's true and maybe it is a ploy to neutralize the undecideds and moderates (defined as those who have their feet planted firmly in mid-air).  I hear talk of the possibility of a brokered convention for the GOP, which would really be an interesting turn of events.  (Go, Sarah!)

So, I am praying for service opportunities and obvious and not-so-obvious needs that someone with $8 to her name can do! 

Been up late tonight, reading and praying and asking the Lord to forgive me for getting off track here recently.  I don't do well with drama, and I slipped into a negative mind set for a while.  I didn't honor the Lord, and I regret that, and repent of it.  I needed to say that to you all, because I have let you down, and the Lord as well, and I need to be accountable to both!  So, I again covet your prayers that I would seek a pure and service-minded heart, without those too-easy detours. 

I am thinking it may be time to start making sack lunches for the homeless, now that winter is over and I have passed out enough soup to feed an army!

Oh, that reminds me.  As soon as possible, I hope to start packing up home-made MREs for my GOD bag (get out of Dodge!).  I have a couple of Mountain House meals in there now, but I would really like to do a better job than that.  

To that end, I thought I would dehydrate some cooked turkey and some cooked rice, along with some of the veggies I already have, then add some bouillion in a FoodSaver bag.  I also have little bags of vermicelli noodles that would work.  I have already made dehydrated mashed potatoes, both white and sweet, as well as refried beans.  I have tested them and the only fault I find is that the mashed potatoes are not fluffy!  That's not much of a complaint, is it?

In reading about home made MREs, I found some people who actually opened up canned pasta (like Spaghettios) and dehydrated them on parchment in their Excaliber, then actually reduced them to powder for Food Saver safe (non puncturing) packaging.  Not sure I could do THAT particular thing, as the flavor of Spaghettios is bad enough, let alone the texture being nothing but mush. 

I did dehydrated some beef stew a few years ago, and it worked beautifully.  I ended up eating it like potato chips, though, and the potato chunks were a little hard to chew!!!!  But it's an idea, and who knows...it might work.

But on the main, I think a shelf stable protein, some carbs like dried fruit or granola bars with a long shelf life, stuff like that, along with the usual suspects, mught be a worthwhile endeavor.  If it only ever gets used in a backyard campout, so what!  It will be a memory!!!  (Those who get a buzz from backpacking or hiking might also be interested in this!)

I watched a couple of videos, if you are interested:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GSgRCq2zV0&feature=related

This one is a total bore the first 6 minutes, but it gets (a little) better.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HYqpfFbBH0&feature=related

I am not sure how much of the pre-packaged stuff I could afford, so will have to experiment with homemade! 

Anyway, that's what I am thinking about at 12:50 in the morning on a Saturday. 

Three Cheese Macaroni Pie

I have heard of spaghetti pie before, and have made angel hair pasta pie with hamburger and nacho cheese sauce (which I ate until I was sick, about 10 years), and tonight I kinda combined the two and came up with this:

I call it Three Cheese Macaroni Pie.  What a coincidence!  That's the name of this post! 

Anyway, it was very simple, and used a lot of pantry items:  pasta, sauce, canned mozzarella cheese and canned cream cheese. and vacuum sealed Parmesean cheese. 

Canned cream cheese?  Yep, and it rocked.  Been in the pantry a few months, just waiting for the appropriate recipe to show up. 

So, I boiled the macaroni, drained it, returned it to the pan, added a quart and a pint of pasta sauce, then the half cream cheese and stirred until there were no more lumps.  I then grated a half pint of mozz and about 3/4 cup of Parm, stirred well and poured it into the pie pans, sprinkled more Parm and baked it for 45 minutes at 350. 

I was really happy with how it turned out.  Will share or freeze...not sure yet. 

Boy, that felt good! (Long, lots of oversized pictures)

Just came in after six hours working in the garden, and I feel SO energized!  Nothing lifts my spirits like the satisfaction of a job well done! 

I built the last two raised beds today, and took a lot of pictures.  Maybe someone reading this thinks it is too hard, or that since they don't have a man to help them, they won't try.  I am here to tell you that if a 60 year old morbidly obese woman with a bad back can do this, anybody can !!!  And by the way....telling the truth about yourself doesn't mean you have a negative self image.  It just means you are honest! 

Okay, here we go

One of the things I have learned from my previous raised beds is that, while it is nice to have them tall so you save your back, the construction materials cost a lot more and it takes a TON of dirt and compost to fill them.  So, the last two beds are made of  3/4"x1'x8' flat topped fence boards.  I just screwed them together on the corners.  Last time, I used blocks of 4x4 or 2x4 to stabilize the corners and screwed the fence boards into those.  I was making the beds two or three boards tall, so I had to do that.  With one board, I don't.  I like this a LOT better.

Okay, so what I did here was to build the bed right on top of the plastic. Then I cut out a rectangle right in the middle of the plastic, leaving a 12" margin all the way around. I cut the margin in the corners at a 45 degree angle, then stapled the margin up onto the boards as a moisture barrier. The rectangle removed from the center was cut into four pieces and used to patch the bare wood in the corners. The top right and lower left are before patch, top left after patch.

This portion of my back yard has been covered with black plastic for more than two years, to kill the Bermuda grass.  It did a great job!  I have weeds around the edges (which I pulled today as well), but not a nubbin of Bermuda to be seen. 

Just in case, though, I laid down some landscape fabric on top of the dirt.

And around the edges, some discontinued USPS mailing boxes I got for free and formerly used for long term food storage until I designed the pantry.  They are folded in half, so a double thickness of cardboard results.

Next, I added a thick layer of decomposing leaves from the compost pile.

Then I dumped in six cubic feet of Amend compost with gypsum.  You can see the result in this next picture, which is a broad view of the whole area.  Next will come at least six more cf of purchased soil in the bed, as my own compost pile is full of weeds right now.  Another item for the to do list.

Behind the bed in question are buckets (some are stuck together, unfortunately) in which I have cabbage growing.   To the right, along the chain link, are a half dozen rubbermaid tubs that I have used in the past for experiments (such as tomatillos).  I will maybe try something new there this year. 

The three beds with leaves on top have potatoes on top of, dirt underneath the leaves.  And the rest of the beds are ready to be planted as soon as it warms up a bit. 



This is a shot from the other side of this area. You can see onions in the lower right hand corner.  It may not look like an ideal, sunny location for onions, but earlier in the day it is sunny, and as we progress with spring and go on into summer, it will be much different; they won't be shaded by the house anymore.  And you can see the other raised bed that I built today in the background.  I will fill it tomorrow. 

Can you see the barest outline of a square in the center of the yard?  There is a 5-6' square of curbing there, outlining a bed.  I think maybe a tree was there once.  My hope is that I will be able to cut away the plastic, put some kind of statue or maybe a fountain there...then plant flowers underneath.  Just to make it "purty".

And here are the gallon and a half buckets with broccoli planted in them.  I have 18 more to plant, but not sure with what.  You have to fertilize regularly in these containers, but they do work. This shot was taken about 3 PM, so they had already had a full day of sun.

And finally, this is the other part of the yard,  south side. 

If you look closely, you can see three trees there.  Left to right, dwarf Santa Rosa plum, elephant ear plum, and semi-dwarf Elberta peach.  In case you are wondering, the fruit trees are encircled at the ground level with bricks about a foot from the tree, and the plastic cut to allow for watering. All three have buds and are starting to blossom.  I want to plant another peach in the left foreground.  I will wait to see if the one I have really doesn't need a pollinator, and if it does, then I will plant a peach.  If not, some other type.  Maybe a fruit cocktail, when they don't cost so much.  Never heard of a fruit cocktail tree?   http://www.directgardening.com/detail.asp?ProductID=5556

Dontcha love the patch job on the neighbor's fence.  They are somewhat, um, un-neighborly, and wouldn't repair the gaping holes, so I did what I could.



You can see a roughly outlined rectangle in the bottom half of the picture, still covered in plastic.  That area had very little Bermuda, so I am considering planting squash there (pattypan, delicata and zucchini).  I don't want to use a raised bed for squash, because I am not much of a fan and am only planting it for others to enjoy (waving to my Mom).  The strip of dirt is an experiment with potatoes. 

And FINALLY this is the north end of this part of my yard.    This was over run with Bermuda, has four or five short raised beds underneath the plastic.  Instead of hand removing the Bermuda, which I am unable to do, I am just going to keep it covered for a total of two years.  But someday again, it will flourish and be fruitful ! 

Reagan is protecting me from marauders....  

Do you see the Bermuda creeping out back in the corner?  I pulled back the plastic last month to clean out a den of gophers, and never replaced it.  Today, I did. 

Okay, there you go!  Do you feel inspired!  Me, too!  (To take some Tylenol !!!)

I look at a lot of blogs by gardeners who do an exceptional job not only with their plants but with the beauty of the yard in general.  I am not able to do that, but instead I focus my resources and energies on the "money" part of the situation - the harvest.  Maybe some day I will have gravel paths and little gnome villages, waterfalls and statues of deer peeking out...but not yet! 

Shh, don't tell anybody, but I can't wait!!!

A fellow blogger meets the food police at school

http://this-newhouse.blogspot.com/2012/02/beware-of-food-police.html

School refuses to allow girl to eat the lunch her mother packed for her.

http://www.theblaze.com/stories/n-c-food-inspector-sends-girls-lunch-home-after-determining-its-not-healthy-enough/

Shocking Canning Fail !!!! (Now with update!)

You have seen the good.  Now for the bad and the ugly. 

I just took four quarts of smoked sausage out of the pressure canner.  This is maybe the fifth batch of it that I have done over the years.   And the first serious fail. 

I had four pieces of sausage, each an inch shorter than the jar, with room for two more, but I didn't crowd more in.  I recently canned hot dogs, and the portion not covered by water turned very dark, like it was roasted a bit much.  So, today with the new brand of smoked sausage ($.98 a pack at Winco on clearance) I decided to add water.  The pieces were floating around in the water, all footloose and fance free.  Lots of room. 

I am thinking this brand of sausage (John Morrell, may be regional) has a bit too much filler in their sausage. 

There is hardly any water left, it is all in the canner.  I haven't washed the jars yet, so forgive the greasy look.  But you want to know the funny thing?  Every jar sealed.  Am I going to toss them?  Of course not!  Just because they exploded, they sealed and will taste delicious.  I will just have to figure out what to do with it so no one realizes THIS is what they are eating !!!

Sure glad I used wide mouth quarts. Imagine trying to get these puppies out otherwise!

UPDATE:  Remember how I said that you were seeing the bad and the ugly?

I lied.

THIS is the bad and ugly.  I decided to test a jar, and this is what happened when I released the lid.  The four sausages had fused into one withered colum of blech.  All the air left the sausage and it collapsed.

The dog won't even touch it.  Not going to waste those jars.  Buh bye....

Renting out my garden

I answered an ad on Craigs List for a guy who wants to do a mini-farm, but lives in an apartment.  He wanted to rent garden space.  I have that area under black plastic and would rent him half of it, about 35x35, maybe 35x40.  He would remove the plastic, take out the weeds, till and amend the soil.  I would provide the space and the water. 

What should I ask as far as rent, do you think?

Thanks, Judy, for the solution!

I just love Judy.  She is practical and solid and helpful.  Glad you are here, Judy.

Once I started to think outside of the tradition, once I stopped thinking there was only ONE way to do Valentine's Day (the way we ALWAYS did it), and after my daughter confided that the kids pick off the red hots anyway, I made other plans.  The original cookies take many hours to back, frost and decorate, and I was up against the clock.  Frosted cookies sans red hots were not a viable option.  (And I was the recipient of a plate of beautiful cookies myself this morning from my grandkids, and a special stuffed animal (her favorite) from DGD12. 

So, I remembered that when I was at the dollar store they had some beautiful plastic plates  that would be perfect for a cupcake...or a brownie!  I had one more brownie mix in the pantry, so I made them up (a little thinner than usual for ease of cutting and placement), and look what I came up with!

I just straightened the crooked one...OCD that I am. 

But anyway, when they cool completely, they will fit in a ziploc freezer bag for transport, and then they will each have a plate maybe for the dresser top or something. 

I made a rectangular one for my parents.  Now to have the courage to take it to them. 

Again, thanks Judy. 

I am gonna tell you my Valentine's Day story.



Once upon a time, I was married for about 15 minutes.  Plus three months.  Long story, sick of telling it.

But, there is one story I can't stop telling, because it demonstrates just how blind love can be.  How's that for a lovey-dovey thought on this day of romance?

It was Valetine's Day a couple of years before we were married.  It should have been a huge red flag, but I made excuses for him.  None of those excuses were "he's an idiot", although that would have been a fair assessment.  No, it was always "he is doing his best", or "he is so busy", or some such thing that proved to him that he could be as big a jerk as he wanted to be, and I wouldn't call him on it. 

My ex husband was (may still be for all I know) a rabid collector of GI Joes and other male action figures.  But mostly GI Joe.  He believed that I ought to collect female action figures.  I had absolutely NO interest in doing that.  I did own one Christmas Barbie that my Mom bought me in the 90's, but it wasn't a collection.   The Idiot set about buying me female action figures and Barbies because he wanted me to be a collector.  They were nice, I guess, but it wasn't my passion.  I really didn't care at all for them.  But I kept my mouth shut, because it seemed to make him happy.  And after all, why did I think I deserved anything else? 

Well, in order to, as Roseann said about the fictional race car driver, Lance, in one of her early years on television, "please that man", I started making custom GI Joe outfits and dioramas for him, and on his birthday and Christmas I would search out vintage figures from his youth and dress them in custom costumes.

That year, I had taken a black haired 1966 Joe and had customized him to look like The Idiot's favorite TV chef, Emeril Lagasse.  I made a chef's coat and black slacks.  I contacted a guy who miniaturizes patches and such from the military in GI Joe scale and had him embroider the coat with a big E.  I took Sculpey clay and fashioned foods Emeril was known for, including garlic, oreo cookies, and the like.  I found to-scale cookware.  I miniaturized the covers of Emeril's many cookbooks and made tiny volumes.  But most of all, I hand cut 24 strips of wood less than 10 mm thick, and 6" long, stained them three colors, in groups of 8, and glued together a perfect little butcher block table for all these items to rest on in the diorama.  I used dollhouse stair railings as the table legs, and I bought a display case to set it all up in for him.  Took me weeks.

Now, The Idiot and I had a long distance relationship.  I lived in California and he lived in Utah.  (No, he was not LDS/Mormon.)  For seven years, we went back and forth every couple of months, and this time I planned to go to Utah in February.   And I made it a point to mention that I would be there for Valentine's Day...hoping he would remember. 

Anyway, I took the parts of the diorama with me and assembled it when he wasn't in the room.  He was dumbstruck when I gave it to him for V-Day.  Except he didn't realize it was V-Day.  And he had done absolutely nothing for me.   The look on his face gave him away. 

But his solution to the problem was what I will never forget.  Did he take me out to dinner? Nope..."too many people".  Did he get flowers?  Nope.  Candy?  Uhhh, no. 

After he was appropriately grateful for all my hard work, he went to the closet, got down on his hands and knees (quite a sight for a 350 pound man) and rummaged around for a bit.  Then he stood up and LOBBED AT ME ACROSS THE ROOM a GI Jane figure, WITH THE CLEARANCE STICKER ON THE FRONT.  $4.99.  He had bought a case of them.  And this was the third one he had given me. 

What an idiot.  No, not him.  Me.   What on earth made me think that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him?  Undoubtedly, he seemed normal to me...but I didn't realize at the time that I had no clue what normal was!!!

It's been eight years since the divorce.  It has FLOWN by !!!!   That one year was the only time in my life I received a gift from a guy/man on Valentine's Day.  He didn't learn anything, because I didn't ask him to.  Why, he didn't even make it up to me the next year!  Lord, forgive me my stupidity.

I always make special cookies for Valentine's Day and give them to the family.  This year, I was not able to find the cinnamon red hots that go on top of the frosting, so I am not going to make them.  I am a little sad about it, but that will pass.  I am having trouble with letting down the grandkids, though. 

So, happy Valentine's Day everyone!  I wish for you all the love you can hold, and a pile of gratitude a mile high.  Never take for granted something as dear as being loved.  Some folks go their entire lifetimes without knowing how it feels to be cherished, adored, protected and provided for. 

Hang on tight to the one who loves you.  Memorize that soft-eyed look of love, the gentle guiding hand on your shoulder, the whispered word, the peaceful smile, the kind gesture, the tender word.  Never take those things for granted.  Some people go their entire lives without any of it.  Sure, a love relationship can be difficult, and most times you have to sacrifice something to make it work.  But you are more blessed than you may realize.  Even on your toughest day, there may be someone who sees you and wishes they had what you have.  Dirty BVDs and all.

Okay, no one will want what you have if THIS is what you have.  I couldn't help but share.

Back in the swing of things

Well, circumstances arose that caused me to become unavailable for Dad's care for a while.  Thank goodness he and Mom agreed to every-other-day home care, and my sister has stepped in as well. 

I have just let the house and the yard go to pieces the past couple of months, and there is an enormous amount of work to do.  Except for my paid job, where I am in some serious trouble.  There have been almost no reports to type during the hours I have been available.  Trying to catch up on both has been difficult.  And to quote Forrest Gump, "That's all I am going to say about that."

So, to get some help and to boost my spirits, the grand girls have been here the past 24 hours!  DGD12 is an enormous help, and DGD6 is such a hoot~!!

I have gotten a lot of canning done, because I don't have to stand there and pay 100% attention to it.  Worked outside with DGD12, did some mending, replaced a part in the shower so that it doesn't drip scalding hot water anymore.  That's something that happens very reagularly (one or two times a year).  I have become quite adept at disassembling the shower hardware, I must say.  I have replaced the valve stem and even the valve seat three times in ten years, just to be on the safe side.  But nothing seems to slow down the deterioration of the washers and gaskets. 

Caught up on laundry and changed the beds, gave Reagan a bath, and right now I am cooking some chicken for white chili, which I will can tonight. 

Waiting for more typing work to flow in.  It has been VERY slow.  Not good.

In the past week, many things have happened that have affected my emotions.  Motives and opinions have been revealed and there has been a lot of painful stuff going on, both for my Mom and myself.  I made some very difficult decisions, and as a result a lot of what we used to call "old tapes" have been playing in my head.  I have been praying "without ceasing" for those tapes, and for the people who triggered them.  And I confessed to the Lord my complete inability to deal with them.  I asked Him to help me find a resolution. 

I also asked for help discerning my heart when it comes to those people and situations which have been so painful. 

Night before last, I was awake at 3 AM, praying.  I felt the need to turn on the Roku TV, and I meandered about the channels until I found TurningPoint with Dr. David Jeremiah.  "Coincidentally" (no such thing) this week's message was on Anger.   I got that sinking feeling, and clicked PLAY. 

Indeed, anger was the topic.  Watching the sermon, I got a clear idea of what the Lord was saying.  Forgiveness.  Yet with the forgiveness, the Lord was also telling me that even though I have forgiven these two people over and over and over, I had not heard Him when He said "you do not have to reconcile.". 

Forgiveness means giving up the desire for justice and certainly revenge, understanding that those who hurt you, especially if they are unsaved, are flawed human begins, just as I am.  But there is never a requirement to restore the relationship, nor to remain in the relationship at all.  I have talked about that before here on this blog, but never completely gave up hope that "normal" might just sneak in at some point. 

That's where I missed the boat.  With forgiveness came my magical thinking that maybe THIS time it would be different and we could all get along.  That did not happen, and by inserting myself back into hurtful relationships, I found no peace, just turmoil and hurt.  And from that hurt and disappointment came anger. 

If I do not deal with that anger, it turns to bitterness.  I was almost there. 

The night I watched the sermon, I stayed awake until 5:30 in the morning and then slept only two hours.  I have been on a marathon prayerfest ever since, wanting to make absolutely sure that I am on the right track.  Every so often, a bit of negative self-talk surfaces.  That kind of thing, in this intensity, is not from the Lord.  It is condemnation, not conviction.  And we know who is the source of condemnation, don't we? 

So, I have separated myself from the company of those who have been destructive to me.  I have forgiven as best I can for now.  I realize that it may be a process, not an event.  I am sad for this turn of events, and to be frank, I grieve for the loss of hope that it could be better. 

I was gravely fearful that I would be required of the Lord to continue to be a whipping boy or a doormat, as that was how I thought a "loving resopnse" fleshed out.  I was wrong.  I now believe that Lord doesn't punish us for being careful with our hearts and minds.  He wants us to obey Him nd be forgiving, but he does not require that we contine to expose ourselves to the same hurtful behavior.  Yes, He is the ultimate protector, but we are to be wise and not deliberately place ourselves in danger (emotional or physical) unless He speaks clearly that we are to do so. 

So, I had put a pinky toe into the anger pool, but the love of God showed me what to do and how to do it...and here I am !

One last thing.  One of the people I have been talking about reads this blog.  I hope you are doing well, and thank you for stepping in to help.  It's a shame you couldn't find a more honorable and loving way to get what you wanted.  I still pray for you, even though you told me I did not have your permission to do so. 

Daughter is on her way to get the girls, I am checking with my job to see if I can work today, and the chicken for the white chili is almost done.  The rain has stopped and the clouds are dissipating.  There is hope just ahead! 

I think I already posted this picture from last month, but I think it REALLY applies today, in a lot of ways. 

Remembering the garden from two years ago...

It is raining today!  YAYAYAYAY!

This post is a reminder to me of where I was and where I have to go.  Many of you have heard this information before, and I apologize for that.  I am just marking a starting point more or less for this year's garden, and setting some goals.  The goal is to make the new part of the garden as beautiful and functional as the old.

You may remember that the old garden was over-run by Bermudagrass last year and I had to cover it with plastic, most of which will remain in place for two years.  Bermuda is stubbon stuff.  And you may remember that the new garden already has had the plastic down for two years, and I have built seven double tall raised beds there, which were used for the first time last year, with great success.  I have room for three more 4x8 beds as well. 

I received a LOT of cabbage and broccoli seedlings from my friend Maureen this weekend (she alsy gave me TONS of Meyer lemons last week, which have been squeezed and a couple of gallons of juice frozen in ziplock bags (one cup portiosn) for lemonade and canning this summer!  WOO HOO!!!

Anyway, I hope to put the seedlings in one of the beds after it stops raining todya. 

Yesterday, DGD12 and I did some work in the garden.


I went to the dollar store and found six-liter size plastic buckets in bright colors.  Using a heated metal skewer, I burned three holes in the bottom of the buckets (stacked them up and did all 12 at once) and we filled them with compost and dirt. 

I also had bought five small laundry baskets.  Maybe 3-4 gallon size.  We lined them with garbage bags, filled the bags with compost and dirt, punched holes inte bags, and placed all the buckets and the bags in the new garden, ready for bush peas and provider beans.  An experiment.  I will report back.   I planted peas in gallon coffee cans my first year, and they did reasonably well, but it wasn't enough soil.  So, we will give it a shot.

I thought I would post a few pictures this morning of the old garden and the new.  The old one was magnificent, but it was my first year gardening and I didn't realize that I was in over my head.  Hopefully I will do better this time. 

2010:

A peek at the start of this year: 

The area on the far side of the chain link fence is the new garden in relationship to the old. 

The sunflowers on the fence grew to 22 feet!

Progress on the new garden, albeit slow.

The colorful buckets and baskets are at the base of the white lattice fence you can see in the bottom left.  If it weren't raining, I would have taken a new picture for you.  The strip of land on the far side, where the trash can and red bench are, will hold the last three beds. 

2012:

I grew lettuce, spinach and fennel in the buckets.  They will get a fresh layer this year, and will hold maybe some determiante pickling cucumbers. 

Since this picture was taken, the leaves have decomposed and sunk down about 6-8".  I have four of the seven beds planted at this point.  I have added four cubic feet of compost with gypsum to each bed and planted onion sets, carrots, and more potatoes.  Coming up are broccoli and cabbage.  Again, experimenting to see what works.  

So, I have now made myself accountable for getting busy on the new garden!  I am considering experimenting with a bit of the old one, in an area where there wasn't so much Bermuda. In the first picture above, that would be the back of the garden, no raised beds in this picture, where the squash and vining peas are.  I have planted three fruit trees in the corners of that area in the interim, with plans for a fourth this spring!  Then the middle could be a place for veggies.  

Okay, accountability established.  Time to get busy !!!